Thursday, January 29, 2009

My First Blog

I'm Kinda new to this thing, but lately I have had so much time on my hand that I decided I needed something to keep me busy. I'm used to staying busy; working three jobs, being involved with groups at school, living at the library, overloading on caffeine to cram for tests, trying to make time for dating, friends and fun, etc.

I realized that for the last four years a huge part of my identity was in being a student. Being a student is an excuse to act your age, then they hand you a degree and expect you to have everything figured out. For some that seems to be the case. I'm amazed at how together some people have it.

I have always considered myself a go-getter, but lately I feel like a hamster on the wheel just running in circles. I did everything they said I should to start my job hunt. I went to every job fair that was held at UK. I posted my resume on careerbuilder and I have worked since I was 15. My only regret being that I don't have as well rounded of resume as I would like.

At 15 I found my first love...RETAIL!! Mostly the love of the discounts!! Ladies you know what I'm talking about. So, I have worked in retail for the last seven years on and off. I tried other things. Working in daycares and serving, but somehow was always pulled back to the mall. I was able to work in three commission based areas which was good for my pocketbook, but doesn't really mean anything on paper. What I mean by that is that sales jobs don't even consider retail sales, sales. I have never understood that. I don't consider myself just a sales person in a store. I consider myself a brand liason. Once a relationship has been fostered between a customer and I my opinion counts for a lot. Customers make look at brands because of my suggestion that they never had considered before. I love being the matchmaker! I love the feeling I get when I see a woman look in the mirror and think wow I look good. I love being the shot of self-esteem they so desperately need.

But back to the topic at hand. The waiting game. Limbo. Between college and the start of the next chapter of my life. I always assumed that it would be easy. Now I understand why my mom would try to hide the laughter as I dreamed out loud about making fifty grand in my first year out of school. Lately I appreciate my parents wealth of knowledge more than ever. I can look back at my teenage years and laugh at how I thought I knew everything. I want to slap the former self and say WAKE UP, but I can't go back now.

I have had some tough times over the past few months, but I finally feel like the storm is over and I can see the rainbow. Now, if only I could find that pot of gold. lol. I have learned a lot from my mistakes. Not just the obvious ones like dont do that again, but also about who will really be there for me. I realized that life is too short to keep looking back.

There is where my spiritual journey started. I realized that I had to relent control of my life. I had been resisting God's plan for my life for too long. I was in Joseph Beth the other day and overheard a lady say something pretty cool;

"If we were meant to figure out life on our own it wouldn't come with instructions (aka the bible)."

I started attending a great church about five months ago with my family. It has brought us so much closer together. I got involved in their children's ministry and attend a group for post college students on thursday nights. I wish I could say it was an overnight change I experienced, but it wasn't it was gradual. Which is good because in the past I have been known to give others whiplash from my quick decisions from one extreme to the other. Everyday I feel like I am growing closer to God as well. I am calmer, more peaceful, and less anxious about my future.

I want to recommend a book to all you women out there Christian or Non Christian:

The Lies Women Believe And The Truth That Sets Them Free by Nancy Leigh DeMoss

Its easy to read and very eye opening. There is also a workbook to go along with it. My Friend E and I are doing a bible study each week and I encourage you to get a group of girls together to hold each other accountable to reading it and applying it in your lives.

I know this blog has been nothing but ramblings. I can't promise that the next won't be the same way, but if your reading this I hope you come back because my friends have always said that my life should be a reality show. I tend to find myself in silliest of situations with no one to blame but myself and they should make for a good laugh.

I'm off to bed now. I have to get up early again tomorrow and continue my job search. Luckily, I also get to go see Rascal Flatts tommorow night at Rupp Arena with my family and friend K. I will be sure to take lots of pictures and post them. Goodnight.

1 comment:

  1. I'm so thankful that you found my blog. Itsn't it wonderful that we have started ours at the same time. It will be fun to share our New Beginnings! I'll pray for you on the job hunt, I'm sure the perfect one is out there.